Standing… In the Mist of My Disappointments

I was asked if being disappointed in God meant that they were an immature Christian and if it also meant that they had little faith? I am here to tell you that being disappointed is not a sign of immaturity and it definitely doesn’t mean that you have little faith, because trust me big faith people have found themselves disappointed with God’s decisions that have been made where they are concerned.

King David is a perfect example of one who found himself disappointed with God and with what he was encountering.

Psalm 94 The Lord is a God who avenges. O God who avenges, shine forth. Rise up, Judge of the earth; pay back to the proud what they deserve. How long, Lord, will the wicked, how long will the wicked be jubilant? They pour out arrogant words; all the evildoers are full of boasting. They crush your people, Lord; they oppress your inheritance. They slay the widow and the foreigner; they murder the fatherless.

They say, “The Lord does not see; the God of Jacob takes no notice.

Psalm 44 begins with an acknowledgement of what God had done for Israel in the past.

We have heard it with our ears, O God; our ancestors have told us what you did in their days, in days long ago. With your hand you drove out the nations and planted our ancestors; you crushed the peoples and made our ancestors flourish. It was not by their sword that they won the land, nor did their arm bring them victory; it was your right hand, your arm, and the light of your face, for you loved them. You are my King and my God, who decrees victories for Jacob. Through you we push back our enemies; through your name we trample our foes. I put no trust in my bow, my sword does not bring me victory; but you give us victory over our enemies, you put our adversaries to shame. In God we make our boast all day long, and we will praise your name forever.

Yet it goes on to speak of their disillusionment: 

But now you have rejected and humbled us; you no longer go out with our armies. You made us retreat before the enemy, and our adversaries have plundered us. You gave us up to be devoured like sheep and have scattered us among the nations. You sold your people for a pittance, gaining nothing from their sale. You have made us a reproach to our neighbors, the scorn and derision of those around us. You have made us a byword among the nations; the peoples shake their heads at us. I live in disgrace all day long, and my face is covered with shame at the taunts of those who reproach and revile me, because of the enemy, who is bent on revenge. All this came upon us, though we had not forgotten you; we had not been false to your covenant. Our hearts had not turned back; our feet had not strayed from your path. But you crushed us and made us a haunt for jackals; you covered us over with deep darkness.

 Hannah, the barren woman who had to watch her adversary have child after child while her womb remained barren had several boughs of disappointment. The bible says that Hannah had a “bitterness of soul” and wept in anguish. (1 Samuel 1-2)

Naomi, Ruth’s mother in Law lost husband and two sons and found herself alone. She suffered disappointment. (Read Ruth)

Sarah suffered disappointment with her closed womb being a derision to the other women. Here she was the wife of the blessed father of many nations and she couldn’t bear one child. (Genesis 12-21)

Job was clearly disappointed. (Read the book of Job)

The good news about the God we serve is the fact that He knows we are human and such have human finite emotions. It is normal to have doubts, times of fear, and pain by the circumstances we find ourselves in. Especially when you reflect over all that led to your current situation and you can’t find anything you did that has caused you to end up where you are. Don’t get me wrong this counsel is not limited to those who didn’t necessarily make bad choices, because if you did make some bad choices know that God will work it out!

One important thing to remember about each one of the above individuals cited – it’s not how you begin it’s how you end.

In each instance there was a remembrance of what God had done and what God could do for them. That is the important place for you, beloved, to reach. You must dig deep within yourself and say as Job said, “Although you slay me, yet will I trust you!” When you can’t hear from God, He seems silent .. you will still believe in Him. When the pain intensifies, you will set your eyes on Him and call on the Holy Spirit to get you through this time. At the end of the day each had to find that special place of comfort in “accepting” what God was doing in their life. James said count it all joy. He didn’t mean that you should be laughing or be jubilant it’s more of an internal joy that God is at work working out His perfect will, and while you may not understand what or why He’s doing it, you know that God only wants the best for you.

Beloved do not think you will completely understand everything on this side, just be fully persuaded that God sits high and looks low, that God is concerned about the things concerning you and He’s working it out not only for your good, but for the good of others, that you will share your testimony with.  

Don’t believe the hype that somehow you are less holy because you find yourself sometimes at a dark place that only God can bring you out of. Being a Christian is not easy. Anyone who tells you that it is – is lying to you. There is a daily battle going on in the heavenly places for you mind, your sanity, and more importantly your faith. They want nothing more than to get you to curse God.. don’t go there.. stand strong!!

The promises that we can stand on are:

·         God will not put anything more on us than we can bear.

·         No good thing will God withhold from those who walk upright.

·         Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lead not to your own understanding and God will direct your path.

·         God knows the plans that He has for you. Plans for your good for an expected hope!

·         Be anxious for nothing but with prayer and supplications with thanksgiving make your request be made known unto God and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your heart and mind through Christ Jesus!

·         All things work together for the good for those who love the Lord and are the called according to their purpose.


So weep it you must, scream if you must, and sit quietly while listening to that still small voice knowing confidently, that He is God. Then through it all praise God in advance for the reprieve, the victory, the end of that journey.

Remember beloved you are more than a conqueror through Him who loves us!

A Message of Hope

My heart was led to write this article as I was reflecting on the fact that I don’t seem to hear many sermons these days that send people away with an excited spirit/mindset of hope and joy. Now don’t get me wrong I don’t mean necessarily, a mindset or spirit where you are jumping for joy, although that too can be the case, I am speaking about a spirit of hope for not just your eternal but your NOW!

Let me say this, as difficult as it may be at times, as tears come and pain increases, I still wouldn’t change the fact that I am a Christian! Because while the stated times above are real, I also can say that I have an inner peace that gets me through any difficult times, and as the song goes, “I've had some good days I've had some hills to climb I've had some weary days and some sleepless nights but when I look around
and I think things over all of my good days out-weigh my bad days I won't complain!” The song continues on “Because God’s been good to me, more than this old world could (or would my paraphrase) be. All of my good days out weigh my bad days and I won’t complain.”

The bible says, “I have come that you might have life and have it more abundantly!” Let’s take a deeper look at what that means. Let’s first look at the preceding scripture. “the thief (Satan) does not come except to steal, and to kill and destroy.”

What is he stealing? Joy, love, happiness, life, laughter, peace of mind, instilled fear, health, and tranquility.

What is the abundant life promised by Christ? Joy, love, happiness, life, laughter, peace of mind, confidence, health, and tranquility.

It’s interesting how depending on who you yield your life to, you obtain the same names of stuff, but the affect is drastically different!

There’s a praise that lives deep in my heart!! A praise that says to God, “It is well with my soul!” You are the head of my life. You are the author and finisher of my Faith! You are my Jehovah Jireh (provider), Jehovah shalom (peace) Jehovah Nissi (my standard bearer)! You know the plans that You have for me, plans for my good, plans with an expected HOPE!!

A praise that tells me that I have been justified by my faith in Christ. So I am now the righteousness of Christ – God sees Christ when He looks at me and you. His blood that was shed on the cross covers me and makes me righteous before God. As Christ is in heaven so am I on earth. What are you talking about Angela? I am glad you asked. As Christ is at peace sitting at the right hand of God, positionally, in Christ I too am sitting at the right hand and have that same peace, if I believe it, yield to it, and accept it by faith. As Christ is whole in heaven, so am I on earth. I and you too, lack nothing in your life, because of the following promises from God:

o   We will never be forsaken, neither will we ever be begging bread. (Ps. 37:25)

o   God supplies all our needs according to his riches in glory. (Phil 4:19) Needs are not only finances. Look to God for all your needs, love, safety, guidance, help, comfort, confidence.

o   We am complete in Christ. (Col 2:10 - For in Him dwells all the fullness of the Godhead bodily; and you are complete in Him) Come on now this scripture should get you out of your chair and send your running around the room!! This means no one can add or take anything away from me or you because in Christ we lack absolutely nothing! Everything we need was placed in us and made available to us the day we accepted Christ as our personal savior!! We have been equipped to accomplish everything this life has for us to do and knowing as Paul said that the day will come with we too can say we have fought the good fight, we have finished the race, we have kept the faith!!

o   Greater is He that is in me than he who is in the world (1 John 4:4). With Christ in us we have protection over every part of our body that Satan may try to attack!! This includes our mind. That is the devil’s playground. It is there that he jacks us all up. It is there that he makes us second guess ourselves. It is there that he causes us to become fearful of things. It is there that all evil thoughts begin, and if I don’t call upon the name of the Lord and invoke the reality that Christ is greater than the devil, then those evil thoughts take root and are born.

o   God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7) So when we become fearful of something we know that it is not of God.

o   For we did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but we received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father.” (Romans 8:15) When we are fearful of things we become a slave to that fear and we’re told here that we are not to be a slave to it. But what are we to do? Glad you asked and I am glad to accommodate. We “Trust in the Lord with all our hearts and lean not to our own understanding.” (Prov. 3:5-6) Now you ask how do I trust? You simply rest in God. Rest what on earth does that mean? It means that you ask the Holy Spirit to take over completely in your life and you yield your thoughts, your actions, your hopes and your dreams to Him. You lay them at His feet and say, “It is well with my soul.” And every time you find yourself picking back up your stuff, and find yourself trying to handle it yourself, STOP, cry Our Father, I cast all my cares upon you. Please take this load for it is not mine to carry. And do that each time you find yourself doing that. Then be still always remembering that He is God all by Himself! This is how you transform your mind by exercising your faith.

So don’t let what you see on TV, see in the streets, experience in your workplace, or in your relationships take precedent over your spiritual reality – God is in control and you expect God to do exactly what He does, handle your stuff, while you handle His – being the salt, the light, sharing your faith, not compromising His word, not stating good is evil and evil is good. Remain fully persuaded that the good work He began in you that He will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

Yes it is well with our soul!! And we will walk every day with a heart of expectancy, hope, and confidence!!

Praise Him In Advance!!

It has been said that faith is substance of things hoped for the evidence of things not seen. (Hebrews 11:1) It is further stated for what is hope if you can see it? (Rom 8:24) In order to walk in a spirit of hope once you’ve prayed on whatever it is, you should walk in a spirit of thankfulness. You should from that point on PRAISE HIM IN ADVANCE! You ask what am I praising God for? You are praising Him for answering your prayer/your requests!

·         If you really believe that all the promises of God as yea and amen through Christ Jesus. (2 Cor 1:20)

·         If you believe that no good thing will God withhold from those who walk upright. (Ps. 84:11)

·         If you believe that every good and perfect gift comes from above. (James 1:17)

·         If you believe that God shall supply all your needs according to His riches in Glory. (Phi 4:19)

·         If you believe that if you concern yourself with the things of God that He will concern Himself with your things. (Matt 6:33)

·         If you believe that if you delight in the Lord that He will give you the desires of your heart (Ps. 37:4)

·         If you believe that you should be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer (general) and supplication (specific) with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your heart and mind through Christ Jesus. (Phil 4:6-7)

If you believe all of the above then you need to shout now!! Thank God Now!! For the great things that will manifest in your life. Why manifest Angela? I am glad you asked. Manifest is the evidence that you get to see when the prayer becomes a visible reality. When Daniel prayed to God and subsequently went on a fast desiring a word from God. The account goes that the Archangel Michael come to him on the 21 day but stated he was held back by Satan, he had his answer 3 days into his fast. The moment that your prayer is sealed with an “AMEN” it’s been answered and the outcome assured it just hasn’t necessarily been made visible in the natural yet.

We are given some conditions for our prayers being answered, I pray that you pray in this spirit:

·         When we pray if we believe it we shall receive it (Mark 11:24)

·         Without faith it is impossible to please God, we must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him (Heb 11:6)

·         We are not to ask remiss. (James 4:1-4 Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members? You lust and do not have. You murder and covet (jealousy desiring things that belong to another) and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures.  Adulterers and adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.)

o   Meaning: asking for the wrong reason

§  I want to pay her/him back (Revenge)

§  Pray for something that will hurt someone else

§  Greed

§  Vanity

·         We should be concerning ourselves with the things of God (Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and your basic needs (food, shelter, and clothing) will be taken care Matt 6:33) Remember when Solomon was asked what did he want God to do for him he asked for wisdom to judge his people rightly. He could have asked for anything in the world, but because his heart was for doing right by God, God blessed him innumerably.

·         We must ask within the will of God (Jesus said not my will but thy will be done before he was turned over for crucifixion.) We must be willing to accept God’s final answer knowing that whatever His decision it is WELL WITH OUR SOUL!! Don’t get me wrong -- shout now that you’ve received it!! Being humble enough like the three Hebrew boys who were put in the fiery furnace when asked where is your God? They stated confidently our God is able to save us and if He decides not to we’ll still praise Him!!

So go ahead Praise God in ADVANCE for the marvelous things He is doing for you and on your behalf!! Because our God is truly an awesome God and He lives and He reigns!! It’s because of that reality that I can face tomorrow!!

So I am going to Praise You oh Lord in Advance!!!

Steadiness – Is your Faith Anchored??????

A good friend of mine, Glen (Galaxy) Runnels, sent me a text, although I am going to tell you what I told him .. that was a text sent straight to me straight from God! That blessed my soul in ways I am not sure that I can articulate, but I am going to try.

In my walk with God, while it is not the only area of struggle, it is the one area that I have battled for years and continue to battle, and that’s remaining steadfast in what I know God has said. Now allowing sights, sounds, phone calls, statements, fears, over take me as I endeavor to live my life as one with God.

I have also made the statement that it would be foolish to think that demonic forces are punks or stupid, they are crafty and smart and they have studied me and you. And when they find they are no longer successful messing with you in one area of your life, they sit back and look for the next weak spot in our armor.

While I can quote the various promises of God I find at times when life hits me fearing or doubting what I heard God say, or what I believe was going to happen wasn’t actually going to come to pass. For some these quotes may be new and for others they are familiar.

1. Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not to thy own understanding. (Prov. 3:5-6)
2. And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him. (Hebrews 11:6)
3. God shall supply all my needs according to His riches and Glory (Phil 4:19)
4. No good thing will God withhold from them that walk upright (Psalm 84:11)
5. If you concern yourself with the things of Mine I will concern Myself with the things of you (my paraphrase) (Matt. 6:33)
6. Be anxious for nothing but with prayer and supplication with thanks giving make your request be made known unto God and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your heart through Christ Jesus. (Phil. 4:6-7)
7. The steps of a good woman are ordered by God (Psalm 37:23)
8.  Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. (Phil 1:6)
9. No weapon formed against me shall prosper (Isa. 54:17)
10. If God be for me who can be against me (Romans 8:31)
11. When a womans/mans ways please God He will them as peace with their enemies (Prov. 16:7)

As I mentioned these are scriptures that I endeavor to stand on and yet not always am I victorious and that, to be perfectly honest, drives me crazy!

Here is the text I received and based on the things I just shared you tell me if you too believe that God sent that text to Angela Harris.

I am training you steadiness. Too many things interrupt your awareness of Me. I know that you live in a world of sight and sound, but you must not be a slave to those stimuli. Awareness of Me can continue in all circumstances, no matter what happens. This is the steadiness I desire for you. Don’t let unexpected events throw you off course. Rather, respond calmly and confidently remembering that I am with you. As soon as something grabs your attention, talk with Me about it. Thus I share your joys and your problems; I help you cope with whatever is before you. This is how I live in you and work through you. This is the way of peace.

Of course I said, “shut up!” Inside joke for those who know me. Tell me that that text didn’t line up with just what I was sharing with you that was a struggle of mine!!

Now catch this, just before I got that text I was studying in the book of Luke and I was just meditating on the pronouncement to Mary that she would have a child having never been with a man. The scripture that struck a huge cord with me and showed me God’s attempt to speak to me through His word was this statement made about Mary. “Blessed is she who BELIEVED for there will be a fulfillment of those things which were told her from the Lord!!

Right!! I’m with you!! I had a hallelujah time today knowing that being steadfast and accepting what God has placed on my heart, as they say in the church, if God said it then that settles it! God was confirming for me the things that He had placed in my spirit no matter what it looks like, no matter what is said, and not matter you think .. Angela Denise Harris whose report  will you believe?!! I fell to my knees and said Yours Lord, Yours!!

Steadfast is defined – as being poured into a mold, unmovable.

Steadiness is defined - the state of continuing without change

I hope my transparent testimony will bless you today and I ask that you all pray for me as I continue this journey, which I understand can only be accomplished if I truly yield my all, I surrender all, to the Holy Spirit and give Him full reign in my life!!

May you live a life that is steadfast and unmovable in Christ!!